wet cat

Thats how I felt tonight. I was completely dissassembled over the course of the class. I went for camel, and it finally happened. I opened up my chest, I went back all the way, and afterwards I collapsed in a heap of wet mess and did not even care. I cried. No biggie, by that point, my face was so red and soaked, no one could possibly have known, but I let loose a few tears and just acknowledged that, yeah, I'm stressed, Im stretched thin, Im going through a lot of memories, a lot of emotions lately with my practicums, I'm tired, feel sick, and a little lonely, so I let it out. I felt much better afterwards, I no longer felt pukey, like the sick in my stomach was those emotions all held in and not hunger after all. I actually felt so good after that I tried to resolve to cry more next time, but I guess there really is no planning that.

name change?

I'm considering an alteration. The running thing is all last year for me, I don't envision a lot more of it in my future. Maybe a nice once a week thing...depends on how my knee heals now, too.

I injured my knee when I got back to the cold after my Mexican Solstice holiday. Big Monday night living room dance party, Van Halen, Diamond Dave, 'Jump', high kicks in my living room, you got the picture. For some reason, after six weeks away from any exercise at all, the very excellent-off-the-couch-split-scissor-kick was amazing in the air, but really lacked on the heavy landing. I am a bit limping now, with a tender spot on the inside of my left knee. Had to cancel my skate lessons for the month. NOT happy AT ALL. the one thing I'd managed not to hurt yet. bam.

The yoga has given me more strength and vitality in 16 sessions than running did. It seemed that the running always hurt. I got some good out of it, I will not stop completely, but I don't see myself feeling the need to prove to myself any more that I can run farther than anyone really needs to these days.

So, studio back open, two more unlimited student months on the roll, and except for taking it a bit easy on the knee its good, very good, to be back. It is still the most challenging, and most worthwhile thing at the same time. It is good for my mind when all this school thinking just isn't.